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    May 31

    8、脚印

    现在,你又要开始你的老本行了,会不会有点儿生疏?毕竟荒废了这么久。这么长时间你都去哪儿了?我既没在客厅的木地板上看到你,你也没出现在卧室的床边毯上,卫生间、飘窗、桌子椅子上,所有你会出现的地方我都细细查看过了,什么也没出现。你都去了哪儿?
    就像之前的无数次,你还是用那句“我就在她的拖鞋和脚底板下面”来敷衍我,我就知道是这样。那么好吧,接下来你准备怎么做?
    女人在门口穿好鞋,站起来,男人已经等了一会儿了。她在几双鞋之间犹豫不定,最后才选了这双白色运动鞋。从穿了这么久时间的拖鞋直接跳到运动鞋,还真有点儿不习惯。她对男人抱歉地笑笑,跟着他走了出去。
    楼梯踩上去有点儿晃。以前不是这样的。不知是她久未出门的错觉还是楼梯真的出了问题。走在前面矮下去的男人好像没有感觉到。也可能,他感觉到了,正隐秘地享受着这种晃悠。搬来这里之前,他们就住过一幢危楼,只要有人上下楼梯整幢楼就会轻微地晃悠,每次都把她吓得要死,他却始终不觉得有什么,甚至,有时表现得还很享受的样子,楼梯危及到性命的晃悠也会上瘾吗?
    走出单元楼,楼口放的两排她一直叫不上名字的花全枯了,只剩些干叶子和未来及得开放就干掉的花苞挂在上面,这让她觉得平时和气的邻居,这些花的主人内心或多或少都有阴影,不然也不会收拾都懒得收拾吧,真是作孽。她假装整理鞋带,蹲下身子看了看鞋底,上面粘了几片干掉的残碎的花瓣。她将它们小心地夹在指缝,放进口袋。
    和小区商店凑在一起的小广场还是空无一人。不用说,人们都去了商店。每个人好像都是为了获取而生,卖力工作获得钞票之后就是不厌其烦地一趟趟进出商店换回需要的东西。很久以来就一直是这样,他们慷慨地将原本就不大的小广场让位给了雨雪风沙和成堆的垃圾。他们迟早会把它糟践成一个垃圾回收站的。这样想着,她不由得用手捂住了鼻子,低头查看脚上的鞋有没有瞬间变黑。
    男人出大门的时候破天荒地和门卫打了个招呼。他冲门房巴掌大的小玻璃窗里挥了下手,表示“走了”。似乎,他们这趟出行缩在小窗户里的脏老头子事先已经得到消息,男人必须给出一个她无法破译的手势才能通过。

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    小司wrote:
    失重的感觉轻飘飘的。
    May 31

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